And Then The Letting Go: Mercury Square Chiron (Nov 24th)

"mercury square chiron"
From some experiences we do not recover. Life hands them over like terrible hostages. Or maybe you are the hostage of the bad dream that came to life. I’ll tell you right now what to do about it:

feel the feeling and let it go.

Now what does this mean: feel the feeling. 

I’ll tell you what it doesn’t mean.

It doesn’t mean it takes a minute. It often takes longer than a minute. It can take years. But you feel. You feel that ten year feeling and then you let it go. I think we hold on because we don’t want to let it go. Because often it’s all we have left. Someone dies and our grief is what’s left. We carry it like we carry their favorite coat. I still have two of my mother’s perfumes (from over 20 years ago).

The blog post I wrote right before this one is here and has a similar theme. Click here to read. 

"mercury square chiron"

This weekend we have an exercise in this letting go because today and tomorrow could make you wince a little.

Mercury in Sagittarius who just wants to say whatever is on their mind comes up against Chiron and painfully so. It’s not just self-doubt. It’s feeling like nothing you ever think or say is okay.

Do you have a Chiron square to a personal planet?

You may feel like you are wrong or mistaken for even existing.

I don’t recommend being born with this aspect but if you have it, you have it and if you have it, you are a teacher. I’m sorry you have to live with this bloody broken heart but the only way to possibly alleviate some of this pain is to accept this fate and not isolate yourself in your pain.

So teach, teacher. You have to teach.

"moon square neptune"

The Stars This Week: SUN

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We have another interesting week on our hands and the SUN is in charge.

I say the Sun is in charge because it’s the Sun making all these aspects to outer planets. And that’s not all. Venus enters Aquarius too. Sign changes are always big news but listen:

we have Sun sextile Jupiter, Sun conjunct Saturn, Sun trine Uranus! Sun square Chiron too.

Sun Jupiter is lucky, Sun Saturn is hard working, Sun Uranus is electric, Sun Chiron yes can be painful, and healing. One by one the Sun touches them all.

The Sun in your natal chart is you but I also believe the transiting Sun in the sky is you too. It lights up that part of your chart. It illumines. Time to discover exactly what. What you need to know.

What I want to say about these is simple: pay attention.

Your Sagittarius House is lit up. Your Libra House. Your Aries House. Yes we have a building Jupiter Uranus opposition with Saturn making good aspects to both!

And here comes the Sun saying: LOOK HERE!!!!!!!!!!

xx

Start Making Sense When Saturn Goes Direct

"sun square chiron"

That astrology becomes this awesome set of metaphors and images we can use. May not have all the answers, but can help. One of many tools? Sure. Why not.

Thinking about an email I received this morning and wanting to write to that person:

Dear So-and-So

DUH!

Love, 

Saturn

Now, is such a letter appropriate? Sometimes ;)

It could, perhaps, get my point across. That reality is needed. That reality has been missing.

That accepting reality is not the same as judging it good (paraphrased from Marsha Linehan)

***

Today’s Reality Check:

Saturn goes direct in June (damn I need to get you the exact date but I’m away from my desk and my ephemeris) which means… we’ll be moving forward again in the issues related to the house where he’s been transiting your chart. Moving forward in our work because Saturn IS our work (Venus will be going direct as well) and moving forward in our love and relationships. I love how this stuff lines up!

These two retrogrades, especially Saturn, have brought us some uncomfortable slow-downs and I’m ready for more Saturn clarity around things. I’m feeling, seeing, the edges of it, but I want more. So I can move forward. And start making sense.

***

Another thought: somanyjens posted something quite beautiful in the comments and I may blog about it later today, the Chiron Dogs post, and how she won’t give up on her 4th House (Chiron is conjunct her IC).

I have a Sun Chiron square natally which is telling me not to give up on my 11th House or my 8th House. Not to give up on myself (Sun).

The Sun also symbolizes men, the father, and the square shows, among other things, that particular difficulty.

The father: Capricorn the goat who steadily climbs higher, whichever mountain. Not giving up on not giving up.

Have you given up?

Love, MP

Yes I will be doing Mini-Moon Readings for the Full Moon in Sagittarius (Eclipse!) 

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How To Save A Life. Or Not.

"moon pluto"
Dr. Grey, Dr. Yang

Sometimes I do everything wrong. On second though, that’s probably not true. Cancerians tend to have a guilt complex. Well, Cancer Sun square Chiron has a guilt complex. And the huge helping of Virgo doesn’t hurt either in terms of the interminable “not good enough.”  And the Venus in the 12th square Neptune? You are sacrificed until you get off the cross.

Yeah, I’m talking about my chart. I need to write here, to blog a bit, before moving on to the next thing. To discharge, clear, my own shaky energy at the moment. And you never know… someone might relate, whether their chart features are similar or different.

The thing on my mind though is this: how do you help someone you love when they are hurting, without making it worse. I mean, let’s say the relationship is under strain anyway…  it’s damn near impossible to keep those feelings OUT, while trying to help. Old resentments, things unsaid. So it all comes tumbling out at the worst moment. You were trying to help. And then you got angry. This is a VERY Virgo dilemma who wants to save and fix and it’s a VERY Leo dilemma who wants applause for the attempt.

But I need to be able to… be freely. Be myself, freely. Write here, on my blog, freely. Lately someone in my life has called me “dramatic,” more than once and for God’s sake I have Venus in LEO *and* I’m a fucking playwright. Fuck yeah I’m dramatic. The actors love it. If you don’t like it? See another show.  I’m intense. And emotional. (Dramatic Pause) But I’m good. I’m really good. And I don’t mean a “good writer.” I mean, a good person. I’m talking basics. Not perfect. Basics.

Free will blah blah blah but our charts are WHO we are.  And yes I looked at two different charts today, same rising sign, same transits and the people are completely different, different experiences. But still!

Glory in yourself, whatever it is. No matter how small you feel at times. Find some glory in your chart. Something. One small thing that is yours and yours alone because how YOU express it is unique. Love that thing. Nurture it. Find the ugliest, most irritating aspect in your chart and tell it that you love it, that you will never let it down, never let it go, that it is worth it, it has meaning. That the world is better because you are in it. And that’s no drama. That’s truth.

What is your truth? What is your ugliest aspect? Can you love it? 

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