When I die, sprinkle my ashes over the diners of New York City is what I think to myself as I walk home from my morning walk and pancakes. Nice cold crisp weather, below zero in actual temperature and real feel. Finally got my layers right this morning and am horrified to learn that it will be in the sixties by this time next week.
Before I talk astrology, let me give you the latest
I think I will start a Substack or something like it — because I want to start a psychoanalysis diary i.e. begin sharing stories from this journey i.e. I started studying psychoanalysis back in September and I won’t know for a while if I’ll actually work towards licensure. One step at a time. It takes years. In either case, I wasn’t sure if I ever wanted to share any of it, but… I’m a writer. So I’m a gonna.
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But as I was saying: When I die, sprinkle my ashes over the diners of New York City. Not that I’m planning my end game, but I’m never not thinking about life, death, diners, and everything in between. What does this have to do with Mercury going retrograde? Everything.
And I can hear you groaning: enough already! Mars is retrograde and the last thing we need is another retrograde! ENOUGH WITH THE RETROGRADES!!!!!
But here’s the thing, dear star lovers:
We need this. We need this confusion, this chaos, this turmoil. We need this. We need both Mars and Mercury retrograde at the same time AND Mars is retro in Gemini, as you know, which makes things even more slippery.
I know you. I know you’re looking for ye ole solid ground and it’s like ice cracking under your skates and you’re about to fall in and what happens if you do? You know how to swim, doncha?
Mercury retrograde is always a soul retrieval, it’s always a cosmic lost and found. You put that thing down in the other room and you forget which thing and which room. Can’t be found if you don’t get lost. I’m getting a vision now of a desert. In the midst of the coldest days so far since I’ve been back in New York City, I’m getting the desert now in my mind’s eye and I can see you have a choice to make, at least two if not three possible paths and what I feel is that there’s no hurry at all so take your time. Without these retrogrades we wouldn’t be able to pick up where we left off.
I’m tired of thinking about the past. Funny. The irony. I’m studying PSYCHOANALYSIS. It made me laugh to myself. It’s winter break. I look forward to spring semester. But it’s time for a break from reading all this dark shit: schizophrenia, transference, neurotic transference, psychotic transference (and that’s stuff I was reading because I want to — not even from the semester’s syllabus readings! It’s my leisure reading!). But even I need a break from the brain.
So. What about this sky? This week Mercury goes retrograde. It’s the least you need to know and it’s maybe the most you need to know. And if you thought you were reviewing it all, life and how to live it, well, all that impulse is about to turn up so get ready.
To be continued