I remember an early conversation (on zoom) that I had with my therapist. I said to him something like: I want to be fearless. I’m almost there. I’m this close. Looking back, I don’t know what I was thinking. It was a hard summer. And I was full of fear. But I felt fearless too and maybe I am. And I just linked a blog post to my Facebook and I had the same thought: that’s my legacy. The fearlessness in telling the truth, as much as I can manage, and maybe it wasn’t always that way. I am making a conscious effort these days to say more and feel more on the blog. Or maybe I was always that way. It feels different though these days. And I feel a little sad to think that this blog will only exist as long as I’m alive. Eventually there will be no one to pay the bill.
Full Moon in Virgo tonight and I feel, I think, exactly how one should when there’s a Full Moon on one’s Moon Pluto conjunction, and I’m getting older by the minute. No time to waste. That’s probably gonna be my last message for this Full Moon, dear star lovers, and I really do love you. Don’t waste time. For me, it’s simple. I don’t have big dreams. Just more writing to do.
So today was a holiday and a friend dropped off a traditional gift of food for me and there was wine in that little wooden box/basket and it was exactly what I needed and I had a glass and the last sip is happening right now and you might feel this Full Moon too harsh. That all that Pisces illusion/delusion is fine as wine and what’s the fuss about and how dare that Full Moon in surgical Virgo get to the truth so quickly and clearly and cleanly.
I don’t know what to tell you. It hurts and it’s hell but it’s REAL. I’m paraphrasing a sentence from that Jim Morrison autobiography which I read when I was 14. It’s better to have these Full Moons. Really. It’s how we make progress.
Okay, that’s all for now.