I find this topic hard to talk about, which makes me want to talk about it even more. Somewhat. Transiting Uranus in opposition to natal Uranus is one of those famous mid-life transits and I’m just about there. But where it takes me is to the body, my body, and its changes.
Last night I asked my boyfriend (am I too old to use the word “boyfriend?”) if he would still love me if my breasts disappeared. Disappeared because I’ve embarked on a major food change and my treasured Cancerian boobage will no doubt be the first to lay down. 40-year old breasts that have been subjected to almost 30 years of exercise and losing weight and gaining weight and losing weight. These are their last days of beauty, although not unpleasant to the touch. I’ve written before about Venus square Saturn, and the ugliness complex, and the self-critical Virgo eye. Well, being self-critical doesn’t mean it’s not true.
So what’s hard to talk about isn’t aging per se, but about the End of Beauty, beauty that I never really had, never really felt, in the first place. Again, Venus square Saturn.
Of course (returning to my original point) there was only one right answer to the question I asked The Boyfriend and he passed the unintentional test but the change remains and the body continues. And sure, men have their own changes to cope with, grey hair and such, Viagra needs, but I believe what I speak of here, the end of beauty, is a singularly female experience, and a painful one.
If women aren’t their bodies and their beauty, what are they? Who are they? What remains? Yes, I know I am speaking from the point of view of a t-squared Venus but these rhetorical questions matter. We must… figure out how to be as we age.
Note to Self: write a *nice* post about aging
Have you had this transit? What changed?
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10 thoughts on “My Cancerian Breasts and the Mid-Life Uranus Opposition”
“So what’s hard to talk about isn’t aging per se, but about the End of Beauty, beauty that I never really had, never really felt, in the first place.”
Me, too. 🙁 I looked in the mirror when I was twenty-five, and thought I might be looking pretty, but maybe not. I felt beautiful just once, when I was twenty-eight. People see pictures of me when I was in my twenties, or from a few years ago, and say how pretty I am (some of them, not all), and I cry, because I didn’t feel it. I was hidden away during a good portion of what are considered by some to have been the best years of my life, and when I was told that they were, I remember saying, “God, I hope not!” I’m really afraid that they were right.
You can see something I posted the other day, with my username @ 43t. (I think this is linking to a page of mine – there’s a link from there).
Thanks Diane 🙂 and thanks for your perspective. I’ve seen your face before – and you are beautiful (Libra!)
Oops, realized I misspelled your name . . Aliza. sorry
Heh, from the perspective of a woman in her mid-sixties w/Venus in the first house, what drives me to keep exercising & eating healthy is pain. If I don’t, I hurt . . . a LOT.
Oddly enough, the time I was happiest with my body was in my early forties. Slowly gained weight after that & then in the last couple of years lost most of it due to not being able to eat a whole bunch of things.
I find the older I get, the less driven I am by the desire to look good for some man. Still, having Venus in the first means I do take time to look my best before heading out into public. **grin**
Good blog you have going here, Aiza MoonPluto! 😀
@Mia, thank you for your kind words 🙂 You are actually at the perfect age to read this. I mean, middle age is far enough away. You are in your glory now. Or maybe I am too. And women older than me – maybe they are as well. My point though is, and you mentioning training, this is also training. Training the self. And giving the worries a little space of their own. Venus Saturn Pluto in the 8th is not easy but I bet it feeds you and those around you. Just make sure to save a morsel for yourself 🙂
@Lyone, I agree with you. And thanks 🙂
I love your comments.I have only 27,but I have Venus conj saturn conj pluto in scorpio in the 8th house.Is “I sometimes want it all” “sometimes I want and deserve nothing”. Let’s add almost no earth in my chart.
I train everyday 2 times a day and when I was 23 went to fitness competitions. But nothing is ever enough. Is really rough when for a woman Venus is affected.
And everytime I read something like this, it heals, I feel stronger.
Mooninpluto always touches scorpio+venus+pluto themes, so I always follow.
Lupa is so right. Personally, I have always been attracted to more “mature” men anyways, so I think they usually see me as looking wonderful, no matter what. But now I am 48, and have all those post-beauty anxieties–droopy breast, chin, skin in general; dark circles, wrinkles, easy weight gain, plus my hearing loss means that I always talk SO LOUDLY!! which is also unattractive?
But being happy IS attractive. And I am happy with myself, in general. I think I have good values, Have made some good choices, do good things for others, am kind to children and animals, etc…..you know? I know you, MoonPluto, and animals love you–that is a sign of deep inner goodness. Trustworthiness. Generousity.
I think if a person can recognize those true elements about herself, then that recognition actually enhances her beauty.
@Lupa, thanks for giving credit where credit is due 🙂 I like your perspective!
I am so much more confident now than I was before 40.
And I know there are men who think that women should look a certain way, but I also know there are men who adore women of all shapes and ages, regardless of the effects of time. I don’t mean to say that they aren’t superficial. I mean men are attracted to a broader spectrum of shapes and sizes than we usually give them credit for.