Relationships always bring you back to yourself… in maddening ways, but ultimately good, transformative, 8th House ways.
Understand this: Moon Pluto people are always struggling in their intimacy. Wrestling with themselves. They are too intense, too domineering, they give too much, or they withhold. They alienate, they go round and round, they self-hate, they wish they could change. How possible is this change?
Here’s the good part. When a Moon Pluto person finds another person to do relationship with them, they can grow. They can… calm the fuck down.
And relationships are fun, yes fun, for Moon Pluto people because they actually feel like they are getting to the bottom of something, which is very 8th House, very Pluto. Not every man or woman is cut out to swim in the shit with a Moon Pluto. Only the big-hearted. Only someone with a different case of crazy.
Storytime: so I’m texting with my boyfriend. Sounds ominous, right? And he says something snappy at me in reply. And then I get upset, and I reply. And then I realize later, after he leaves me a voicemail, that he’s anxious. And anxious about something other than what I had assumed.
Ten minutes later, I’m on the train, and I realize that I am anxious too. For different reasons.
I am looking at my notes for this blog post and realize I cannot end it how I had originally planned. It was a sweet sentimental ending. But as I type here, I feel more Saturn (sour) than Neptune (sweet) because I wonder if I really can change. I will always be me. I will always over-do. I will always be intense. I will always be too open. I will always be too closed. I will always make mistakes. No matter how much Virgo Moon pines for perfection, Virgo Moon fails, and sometimes the struggle to understand the other person is…
Wait a minute! Do we have to talk about Chiron again? That’s what this is. That’s what this feeling is right now! This deep pain which comes from my… where is it? I am trying to find it. I can’t find it. Somewhere between my collarbone and my stomach. I have Chiron in the 8th House. And on my 7th House cusp by transit. God forbid I should let someone get to know me intimately (8th House) because once they do? They will hurt me without meaning to, time and time again.
So this blog post is less sweet and sentimental than at first, but, I think, more emotionally honest. And it was the relating itself that brought me here. To inspiration, to writing, to hopefully helping others, to understanding myself better, to understanding him better.
Here is something from the original draft: Dear Boyfriend, if you ever read this blog post, please know that I would not trade our misunderstandings for anything in the world. But if you fail to appreciate my humble musings, I will pour out my wrath upon your…
Just kidding, just a little Moon Pluto humor to lighten things up 😉
Contact Me to talk about your Chiron