I am not satisfied with what I read on blogs or in passing on Facebook about astrology. It feels false to me or shallow. I’m a tough audience, tough critic. Move me. Inspire me. Make me not want to die. I write from my own life. I write from pain and from suffering and from confusion and from joy, rebirth, and redemption.
So maybe that is my job. To make you not want to die. To make you want to live another minute.
Too much to expect from a blog post? Maybe. Maybe not.
I just finished a reading for a client. She said to me: I FEEL BETTER. She was in crisis a couple days ago but I couldn’t do the reading until this morning. I FEEL BETTER she said. Thus I’ve done my job. She’s in a heart crisis, a fear crisis. But she’s okay. She will be okay. I have so much more empathy for these matters of the heart these days because I have my own matter of the heart.
SO Chiron goes direct. What goes direct for you depends on your PISCES House and the aspects it makes to your chart.
You cannot lose faith. You cannot lose hope. I mean: you should not. I hope not. Even if that hope is small. One more dollar. A dollar of hope. And I know sometimes that hope can feel like too much and you need to go into the dark place. Put your dark sunglasses on. Wear black. Wail. Eat spaghetti followed by a mountainous ice cream sundae.
Yesterday I was talking to a client who finished her chemotherapy treatments. She is crying all the time. Life feels bleak. I was trying to encourage her to cry until exhaustion. I said to her, you now what they say at the gym, to lift that weight UNTIL FAILURE. Cry until failure. Until you are too tired to cry anymore and you fall asleep. She has a Libra Moon. So I asked her: do you get distracted? Do you stop the cry? Do you decide whether or not to cry? Are you trying to balance your cry? And I said to her: I AM A GOAL ORIENTED CRYER which she loved and told me to write it down so here I am writing it down.
Dear Libra Moon lady, I love you and I feel sick that you have had to suffer so and if I could take your suffering away, I would. If I had that power. It’s too much. IT IS too much for one person to bear. I know that feeling myself.
But you are STILL HERE. Chiron goes direct in her 5th House. She’s a writer. And she wants a boyfriend. Pluto is trine her 7th House Venus. Hmm.
No matter how broken she feels, no matter how broken she IS, I encouraged her anyway, according to her transits, I encouraged her TO LIVE. I didn’t use those words exactly. Maybe I should have. But that was the gist.
“Live or die but don’t poison everything,” wrote Anne Sexton.
We are all deformed. We are all love. What choice are you going to make?