Born This Way: My Venus Story (Part One)

"venus retrograde in leo" I just blogged about Venus entering Leo and this summer’s Venus in Leo retrograde —
and I want now to blog a little about what Venus means to me. At this time.

And then we’ll get more “academic” in future blog posts.

Venus to me… is inseparable from conversations about gender norms — because I have little to zero interest in some “typical” female concerns i.e. pleasing men (through my appearance or actions).

I wasn’t always this way. Uranus is square my Sun and Mercury. FROM THE 8th HOUSE. LIBERATION FROM BULLSHIT. (Yes the 8th House is rife with bullshit. I say this because the 8th House is trauma and it wounds us and we must heal and clawl our way to the 9th House of Perspective & Mountaintop).

Oh yes I wasn’t always this way. And I’ve got the scars to prove it. Venus in Doormat at your service. Use me, abuse me, etc etc.

"venusin leo"
IN FACT I had a therapist once (years ago) tell me that I was “abuseable.”

He was right. I got myself involved in some pretty hairy situations in my 30s and even into my 40s. Unkind men, broke-ass using men, be-my-sex-slave men. All manner of ridiculous. I see now my self-worth was pretty much nonexistent.

See, I am the ideal. Not them. I AM THE PRIZE. Not them. This is why they wanted me, fed on me, discarded me when I had no more interest in giving myself away. Remember, Neptune rules my 7th House. Pisces on the descendent. I saw their POTENTIAL. Idealized them. I didn’t see me at all.

This isn’t really a cautionary tale but trying to explain how, I think, for many of us, Venus matters are complex — and how you won’t ever catch  me talking about that “cute outfit” or asking you for lip gloss recommendations — but you are no less powerful despite your interest in cute outfits and lip gloss — although I may say you are more “typical.”  Born that way, perhaps 🙂 And I am exit stage left doing my thing.

(I alienated more than one male suitor in recent months due to my refusal to play the coquette sexy selfie game.)

Does this make me Venus-less? No. Does this make me not a woman? No. Does this comment even on my sexuality? Nope.

But I think the gender norms are such a straightjacket that — a woman CAN wind up feeling “less” if she deviates from the “norm,” from woman as Object.

Men would wonder where THAT woman was when they met me. That woman they see everywhere in the media. You mean you aren’t a porn fetish barbie doll rose petal bubble bath yay! Then what ARE you?

"venus trine uranus"
Listen, for years my Venus was all Venus Neptune. I have a 12th House Venus square Neptune. Self-sacrifice, masochism, endless longing, endless disappointment.

Snore. Bore. I’ve changed. 

But if Venus isn’t about appearances and surfaces (which she does indeed “rule” in astrology), then what IS she??????

I think we have to look BEYOND the usual and go deeper… which isn’t really what Venus is about in astrology. And yet she is!!!! Venus rules LOVE. Venus rules MONEY. And more…

To be continued… 

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