My Canadian husband and I wanted to go out to eat today for something very special but the place closes at 4pm and there’s too much work to do.
Maybe Tuesday. They are closed Monday. It’s Thanksgiving today in Canada. Didn’t know this. He didn’t tell me either. I accused him of assimilating 😉 I could have had TWO yes TWO Thanksgivings! Well, maybe next year 🙂
And speaking of husbands, I’ve been getting emails and messages, wishing me good luck on my new marriage. Thank you. I also get the occasional troll, but never mind about that 😉
The good ones feel encouraged by my status. I’m no longer an alter maidel 😉 But, more importantly, love is possible. There are men (and women) interested in commitment. Even — gasp — Sagittarius men 😉 (Not everyone wants to hook up, I know this.)
And I WAS going to put together 10 handy dandy tips for blah blah blah 🙂 but I rather talk about THE STARS NEXT WEEK but let me say this:
You have blind spots. You’ve been in therapy. Once, twice, off and on, for years. However long. Whatever. You process your experiences and feelings and childhood memories with friends. You’ve loved and lost, loved and gained, you share it all or none of it. Maybe you’re a lone wolf except when you’re in bed with Mr. or Ms. Not So Right.
No matter how much you think you KNOW IT ALL and that it’s them or fate or transits and not you… it’s still you.
You have to get below the below (Saturn in Scorpio!) of what you think you already know, what you think the truth is.
Relationships, intimate relationships, are triggers. Daggers. Even CONSIDERING a relationship can be triggering. Having someone attempt to penetrate your wall of fear. Your wall of fear can go up so high that it covers up the teeny tiny peephole that lets the light in.
Nasty 8th House planets may have this effect on you. Chiron there. Saturn there. Even Mars there. You may be alone. Or have no shortage of potential partners but no one who’s really good for you. Or who you really want. Or so you tell yourself. You may make decisions based on fear, based on Saturn or Chiron or…
And when you find yourself doing the same old thing, having the same old reactions (which you have to be mindful enough in the first place to notice it’s even happening, to see the pattern….) spending another year alone, then YOU KNOW that it IS YOU. Not the way you look but the way you THINK. (There is a man (or woman) out there for any physical type. I believe this. And I don’t mean creepy fetish people (lol) I mean someone who genuinely finds you beautiful and is attracted to you.)
Many people don’t have love (who actually want love) because they push away love. He’s too fat. She’s too thin. He doesn’t like Star Trek. She doesn’t eat meat blah blah blah. Superficial crap. YES chemistry matters. NO you shouldn’t say YES to just anyone. We do need the basics. Attraction, respect, friendship, chemistry. PLUS WANTING THE SAME THING from a relationship. But the next time you DO say YES or NO to someone, scrutinize WHY you did so.
One of my issues is that I’m a moody Cancerian. On any given day, I could wake up all grumbly about my boyfriend, some perceived slight or… comparing how I wanted to feel with how I was feeling (in that moment) and take that ball and run with it and maybe we’d have a fight or I’d convince myself it wouldn’t work. And I’d grumble and shriek to my best friend about the latest. I had to learn how to relate, how to be in a relationship.
And then… by mid-morning I’d wonder WHY. Why was I causing all this drama. What were these habits, patterns (and in my case possibly fear of letting someone love me — in all my imperfection, in all HIS imperfection) that were so entrenched. And what was he doing that was triggering me. We both had work to do. It wasn’t just me.
When my husband moved to New York, he moved in with me. We didn’t exactly have a plan. Sagittarius, right? It was crazy for so many reasons but looking back now I believe it HAD to be this way. We had to make ourselves deal, work it out, work it through. This may sound controversial to some but… we’ve had more peace, more peaceful hours, since we’ve gotten married, than the entire time we’ve known each other. I think it settled us both down.
Now about the Stars Next Week:
Mars enters Virgo and we have the Full Moon in Eclipse in Aries. I realize as I type this that I need to write separate blog entries for these both and I will, but in the meantime, let me leave you with this:
It’s time to clean house. Whatever that means to you. The Full Moon will usher in an end and a beginning. Mars in Virgo will ARM YOU with EXACTLY WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW the 411 INFORMATION which is surprisingly right in front of you. Not across the hall. Or across the world. Or in the stars. But right here. (His face.)
And wouldn’t you know it? I pulled The Star again. From Rachel Pollack: “… the card expresses hope, a sense of healing and wholeness, especially after emotional storms.”
And then she makes this AMAZING point. That the Star and the Tower (yes the Tower) suggest each other even when only one is present.
Chew on that, my friends 🙂
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