I know some of my peeps are liking the memoir-ish posts so here’s Part Three.
When we last left our heroine she was leaving her religion, dating East Indian men with dominant tendencies, and generally dazed and confused.
Want to know what turned it all around?
Work turned it, my life, all around.
See, Cancer people (like me) need Saturn (Capricorn), need work, need structure. Cancer and Capricorn oppose each other on the zodiac wheel. They need each other. And yes some charts have both these energies strongly, but not mine although my Saturn is pretty well aspected…
I had spent my entire adult life, after graduate school, THE top graduate school for what I had studied, going from dead-end job to dead-end job. What kind of fuckery was that? I really had no clue. You mean there were no jobs for poets? Really? Understand, I grew INTO all those work-obsessed Virgo placements in my natal chart.
The only jobs I could tolerate were weird or had weird hours. Like teaching! Like working in a group home for elderly developmentally disabled. We could work three hour shifts. No 9 to 5 here. But always in service. It was a great job for depressed people because you could take it easy, take your meds, give their meds, smoke on the porch, make dinner, go to Wal-Mart. I drove the big blue van.
Uranus (the weird) rules my 6th House! Uranus (the genius) natally is in my 2nd. I need freedom. I need to make my money in “different” ways, in ways that please me. I need to make my own rules. I need I need I need I need.
I have my North Node in Pisces my 6th House of daily routine, work, maintenance, self-improvement, health, pets. Service once again. Until I figured out the work piece… I couldn’t move forward emotionally, karmically, any which way.
Long story short: I started a small business and I started it one step at a time (which means you can do it too, if you have similar struggles). Uranus in the 2nd is an insecure living. You never know. It’s erratic. It strengthens your faith muscle. Your faith muscle won’t strengthen until you hit rock bottom.
Uranus in the 2nd (or 1st) will do what it wants anyway (as my mother would always say about me).
Flashback a couple years: I had mice in my apartment. The exterminator came and said the ONLY thing that would work would be to get a cat. The smell of the cat. I didn’t want to get a cat. I knew I would become attached to this cat and wouldn’t want to leave the house. Cancer Sun, Mercury, Mars: I get attached! North Node in the 6th House: small animals, pets! I had to do it, right?
Serve or suffer serve or suffer serve or suffer. Virgo/Pisces type charts HAVE to help. If you see a Virgo/Pisces person NOT helping someone else? It’s like a Capricorn who can’t hold a job.
So I put the word out in my ‘hood and found Kitty — she had been rescued from the streets in the dead of winter, found under a car. She had gone from kind soul to kind soul until she wound up with my friend but my friend couldn’t keep her. She had two cats already. Kitty chose me. Jumped on my lap. I took her home. No more mice.
If it weren’t for Kitty, I never would have started pet sitting, which I did for years, visiting cats and dogs all over the city, going into and out of empty apartments, visiting the lonely, the sick, the cozy, the content little critters. Every day on the train, neighborhood to neighborhood, even in the bad weather, which seemed to keep getting worse in the later years that I did this — blizzards, hurricanes, subway strikes.
During the subway strike I walked to Bed Stuy (not knowing really how to get to where I needed to go) to make my visit. The cats and dogs were my responsibility. For the first time… I took pride in MY work. See, it had to be MY work. My choice.
This is a North Node story really. AND a Uranus story. Got to get this shit figured out. Make sense?
(My posts are designed to make you think about your own chart.)
My North Node although in my 6th is conjunct my 7th House cusp. So I got some of the work stuff squared away. Next part of the story is 7th House. The committed relationship!
To be continued…
P.S. My poem is going to be in this journal (and a short blog post too) but the content isn’t up yet! Support them, join their community, like their Facebook page, submit writing, etc.