Cancers retain memory like water. They get THE BLOAT. They hold grudges. Sometimes I’ll slip up and forget that less than savory thing you said or did and then I get burned again but I think that’s more due to my Neptune problems.
It took me years to REMEMBER that I couldn’t be around my Grandmother. Couldn’t change her. Couldn’t make her a loving person. Couldn’t make her… the mother I needed after my mother died.
Yesterday on the phone with my sister I brought up my Grandmother. My sister (with her Mercury Saturn opposition – not the most sensitive of placements) laughed, suggesting I needed to get over that one. I wasn’t bringing it up out of… fraught-ness. Simply another example of family I had tried with, tried to be close to. If a puppy snuggles up against you, you don’t ignore the puppy. You snuggle back. I have a Moon Pluto conjunction. I need the feeling, the energy, to come back to me. Oh that MoonPluto so demanding!
I also have an 11th House stellium, Sun, Mercury, and Mars in Cancer. Friends were always my family. My actual family? I had to go father out (second cousins) to find heart and support. I’m particularly close to one of those cousins. I wrote her the other day: I think I was hatched. Me too she said.
By the way, I don’t tell these stories for any other reason than… well.. I’m a blogger but also because you may feel the same and you may feel horrible or like a freak because your family experience was not all warm fuzzy Hallmarky. It’s taboo. It’s taboo to admit… something different. It’s taboo to express feelings in public, especially ugly ones like anger. Or contradictory feelings. Love and hate. Or indifference. Or shame.
Cancer takes things personally which can lead to hurt feelings but I wouldn’t change it. I know that who I am and what I do has value. I’ve lost count of how many people I’ve helped in part due to this much maligned sensitivity but I know that emotional intensity is a strength and not a weakness. I tried to explain this to my Scorpio friend. He wasn’t convinced.
And when I write posts like I this I always feel it will be “bad for business” but I have to do it anyway. I have to make sure you know that you aren’t alone.
Love, MP
42 thoughts on “Sensitivity Alert! Moon In Cancer”
I had a question and a quote I was reading reminded me of it. A lot of people tell me I’m negative, make negative observations. The thing is, I wonder if keeping back my negativity, fears, or worries rather than this need I have to talk to someone confess my fear and be reassured/validated, would I be healthier or more “positive.” When I’m afraid or sad, keeping it to myself tends to make me spiral into sad thinking. Even when I should put on my “big girl britches” and have to hitch it up in a crisis. I seem to NEED to talk to someone maternal or reassuring (I have Moon/Mercury in Crab in the 6th trine Pluto.) Does attempting to think positive and repress negative work for a Cancer Moon?
I remembered this through this quote, which I really feel:
“I know part of my dharma is to openly discuss shadow, dark side, depression, and bring it into the light. Repression of our emotions and shadow was part of the patriarchy and has lead to so much anger hate and suffering– we don’t have to live that way anymore. Writing about my pain and confusion and wounds for me is as close as I can get to say, a tumor extraction. If I don’t reveal/release it, I get sick, stuck. We pull out the pain and we look at it, it dissolves in the light, we heal. It’s OK to feel all of this. This is polarity, tantra, we can’t have one without the other, light without dark. Remember how our bodies are about 70% or more water- and when water gets stuck, it gets diseased, the stagnancy creates disease? When I hold back, I get stuck, I get diseased. So releasing puts me back in the flow, like a wild river, I push through the dam. Don’t be worried about me, I heal by doing this.” – Sarah Durham Wilson (“Do It Girl”)
I don’t think repression works for anyone, D
True. I think that saying positive things and thinking positive or not bothering people with one’s personal issues are mostly about getting along with people/making things pleasant for them. Or thinking that if you say positive things and think positive, it will make you a positive person. A la affirmations and stuff. I don’t know about other Crab Moons, but I have to work on my ability to parent myself/coping skills (without laying my sadness or fear at someone else’s door.)
Test:
♥
Use “&+hearts+;” no spaces without “+” for WordPress. “<+3" no spaces without "+" for Facebook. Not sure about Twitter. 🙂
WOW!
Thank You and ALWAYS keep posting about “Un-Rockwell-ness” of your family.
It will rid you of the Poseurs in your world.
They are an utter waste of your precious time. You will be there and BE THERE no matter what for them.
They will not be there for you.
Good riddance!
One of my friends told me one time- you can’t post the TRUTH about your family on myspace.
You can’t tell anyone.
EVER
Just act like it never happened- that’s what I do.
Yeah but HE HAS family. No matter how dysfunctional, HE HAS FAMILY.
I DON”T
And not because of anything I did either. He doesn’t have to worry about some of the LIFE things I do.
He’s never going to BE homeless if he doesn’t comply. If somebody rips HIM off- he’s FINE. If something happens people will be there.
YES HE WAS ABUSED, and he wasn’t alone he had 3 brothers, and his mother.
The other kids that came afterwards- have no clue- and they are just BEYOND self absorbed. Unreal.
I was abandoned and abused AND I WAS ALL ALONE.
Lotsa hand wringing for sure- but what good does THAT ever do?
When I get my life reworked and destroyed it’s USUALLY by somebody who had the cake and ice cream childhood.
They cannot even IMAGINE how they devastate someone like me- when they pull their shit. That last wife of my dad’s made sure I HAD NO ONE I reach out to.
We didn’t have internet back then….
So…. yeah lucky me.
I try to tell this guy I was dealt, I AM SMARTER and KNOW HOW TO DO ( whatever it is) BECAUSE I’ve HAD YEARS ON YOU- that I HAD to figure out how to live.
I won’t get into details because it doesn’t matter anymore. But the reason I HAD everything I had by the time I was 25 WASN”T because it was handed to me.
I didn’t have time to wait.
I didn’t have that luxury.
It’s OK to post this shit. IT”S OK and YOU NEED to post it. It’s the TRUTH it’s RAW and it’s the way YOU FEEL.
The only way you can get thru it- IS TO POST IT.
It’s cool. I know. I’m there and I love ya for it even more.
And yes it WILL cost you love of your friends- trust me. It’s cost me everyone I know.
They can’t even imagine that vortex.
But it’s cool, I’m used to it.
My mother abandoned me after I was born to chase some other dude, my father found an abusive kindergarten teacher to marry ( the Glorified Babysitter that will never be punished ) , her goals?
Get married.
Make a baby
and get rid of that ANIMAL this husband came equipped with BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY.
I was homeless before I was a teenager, complete with fractures, bruises and too young to get a job.
I was safer on the streets than under my father’s roof.
I was literally ERASED.
Both of the psychopath wives hijacked my inheritances and are living well and quite happy!
How lovely for them. And their children.
I have pretty much destroyed my life by making sure I didn’t repeat those mistakes or get a leash around my neck. Refusing to reproduce was frowned on.. obviously.
Marriage? OMG NO
And right this very minute I’m still reeling with something I found out during the eclipse, which by the way was going SO WELL for me. SO this didn’t HAPPEN TO ME- I just found out something that wrecked my world.
I miss my cues.
And it is all around this FUCKED UP FAMILY SHIT!
So technically- it fucked with my head. I AM OK. My head isn’t.
It was like watching my movie sans violence and THE MISTAKES trying to rectify the damage- and it cost someone their life. Anniversary when they pulled the body from the river was YESTERDAY.
A picture- ( the “timing thing” ) of my life that COULD HAVE BEEN SO COOL, but I chose to keep moving.
WTF WAS I THINKING?
It’s OK. Say what you FEEL- I’d sell my soul for honesty out of my people over anything. I just don’t know people who can handle the truth.
I can handle your truth.
I’m fine with you.
I love you.
And the GOD you search for – however you choose to search- appreciates your efforts to reach. Of this I AM CERTAIN.
🙂
OXOXO
>^:^<
Yup, yup.
“If a puppy snuggles up against you, you don’t ignore the puppy. You snuggle back.” This is kind of how my Moon/Mercury works. I tend to burrow into people’s sides when I’m scared or have a problem and I hope they don’t stiffen, but kind of scoop me up. That’s not always what they can or should do.
The weird thing is, a lot of astrologers use the word “sensitivity” interchangeably with Piscean permeability, susceptibility to the mood of the room, energy, sensory stimuli. Cancerian sensitivity is different, something like “touchiness” which debases it.
How is sensitivity a positive?
One thing I can say is I do liberate a lot of introverts and listen a little/tell them the intensity they’re feeling is okay to feel. I don’t know if I do liberate them, though, maybe I don’t help.
My guy kind of calls me on my defensiveness continuously. He thinks it comes from bad self esteem. My not being able to take random pecks of criticism. I tell him it’s an entrenched part of my character. Is defensiveness a flaw or a part of the character of a Crab stellium? Is it an excuse to say it’s my character without working on it or a statement of fact?
I think it’s both. I’m sensitive to someone’s feelings. I strive not to hurt. Don’t always succeed but it’s foremost in my mind. But am I touchy? Yes. That too. And yeah I am not permeable like a Pisces except in close quarters…. and probably some other exceptions too. I feel energy. I work hard to block it out if I want to block it out…
We are defensive and touchy. So we can work on it. Learn when other have good intentions… But yeah there will always be some of that I think…. The safer we feel, the more we trust and then we get bit and the cycle continues…
When I went to visit my Scorpio friend in Las Vegas, his Mercury in Scorpio was so cutting it took so much work on my part to… not get hurt. But it was a gut reaction. I would feel punched and then would have to scramble back up and make my mind take over.
Reread what you wrote. It really is both. I have a lot of Virgo energy in my chart. There is always room for a little improvement but working with the feeling nature is tough because it’s instinct to dodge the punch or even to punch back– can happen before you realize it. Have to slow down Cancerian reactivity. Also helps if his Moon matches yours nicely.
Yeah, if I think he does it out of caring, I’ll try not to get too mad. He has a Libra Sun and Venus and a Virgo Mars. It’s the Libra that gets to me because he doesn’t come from the same place and says I’m illogical. When I panic because he pointed out some medical problem I may have. I played with the time and his moon is somewhere in Pisces, smaller chance of late Aquarius.
This just fell into my lap today. Required viewing for any defensive Crab 🙂 I guess being super defensive is a great way to be delusional and never improve. Sure, I’m not THAT bad, but lately I bristle at a lot of “real talk”
blogs.sfweekly.com/foodie/2013/05/the_best_of_the_crazy_amy_meme.php
Cancer Strength: The Crab is (in evolutionary terms) the toughest and most durable of all the animal symbols of the Zodiac. Yes, even older and tougher to trample than a Scorpion. 🙂
Now how do I make those little Apple hearts again? 🙂
It’s the “less than” sign, < , followed by 3. As in "It took reading less than three blog entries to realize I love your blog."
I want make up my own emoticon. Fuck <3
🙂
See? No heart. My Apple products are defective. Oh and if you like my blog, then please share my posts with your…. over 1,000 FB friends 🙂
And so delicious with ginger and black bean sauce.
Yum!
This is why Cancer is so sensitive. Cancer knows instinctively that somewhere, someone wants to crack them open and dunk their flesh in melted butter. 🙂
Is that your way of asking me out? 😉
Yes. You be your sweet tasty self, and I’ll bring the butter.
Yeah you’re right. I walked right into that.
But let my Virgo Moon take over for a moment if you don’t mind. If you are going non-organic, then Breakstone’s is fine, salted or unsalted, stick or tub. But if organic is your thing then ooh ooh ooh there is this one butter from Maine that I…
Never mind 🙂
Even though the Scorpion “is nature’s way of saying ‘screw you, I’m gonna combine lobsters, spiders, and nightmares?'” https://lh5.ggpht.com/-BXD_XBPktKg/UO77wYghdwI/AAAAAAAAHgw/4UNoQIBYxig/s640/304_10152167528638475_818996886_n.jpeg
This Cancer momma w/ a 6thH Pisces moon conjunct Jupiter remembers ALL & w/ Venus conjunct Pluto opposite it’s categorized!
This is a GREAT article and I don’t see these stories as “bad for business”. Sadly we ALL relate. I feel we’re all SEARCHING for the answer of “I”. We want to understand how/why our story via our pains, secrets & family put us & made us who/where we are now. How do we fix & RELEASE these so we can be our best selves. You once told me “understanding is an under rated step in healing” this is absolutely true.
I’m sad for the little puppy, all deserved to be snuggled (((A)))
LOL Tracie. I love that. You’ve got it categorized 🙂
Everyone’s cookin today! Thank you for your insight!
🙂
My niece (who is 9) has Moon/Pluto/IC conjunct. To say that her feelings are intense is an understatement. Since I’ve made a point to look at her chart I’ve been trying extra hard to be a soft heart to go to. Her family life is chaotic, emotionally. Your comment about ‘going further out’ is interesting…
I may have Capricorn Moon (which many people say is cold and unfeeling) but it is trine Chiron/IC and I do relate to Cancer energy a whole lot.
You’re very sensitive, Kash. I can testify to that
Pluto does bring chaos…
Great comments today. Thanks y’all 🙂
Cancerian here. I always say “Vulnerability is the new black.” Thank you for this post. Spot on. Not many understand our depths and why we must always “go there.” It’s natural and a part of our beauty in expressing and loving someone so truly. I love being a cancer and wouldn’t trade it for the world. Our connections are rooted with pure heart and soul. Our connections are forever, because of that …
Love & Light!
Well said, Vanessa Marie. Love & Light to you too 🙂
Thanks for this. As a Cancer rising, I wear my heart on my sleeve. Took me years to realize this was not a bad thing.
Thanks you too, Nadia.
Well, I am Cancer in the 11th, too, sun and Saturn so I really feel you! I would be sad if you didn’t write these.
Reconciling the different energy in a chart is so important. Cancer and Aquarius is a tough one. I think of it as broadening the definition of family. Liberating oneself from its confines, moving the family into the future. Unconventional families etc. Cancer in the 11th is a very different animal than Cancer in the 2nd or the 8th or something.
I was maligning my own sensitivity the other day or at least making some statement about how fucking exhausting it can be and my husband (stellium in the 4th in Cap/Aqua) just gently reminded me that I couldn’t do any of the things I do without it. And he’s right. But it ain’t easy.
🙂 Hey mustn’t make Krs sad! Will keep ’em coming 🙂 Yeah unconventional families, moving the family into the future. Love that! And I agree. It’s not easy to feel so much and almost all the time.
Part Two of this post is that Cancer must begin to see their vulnerability as strength, as a good thing, even as they cry. Feeling deeply is… not a problem. Others will make you feel like it is THE problem. They are wrong.
I love this … thank you.
Aw thanks, Liz. Thanks for reading
Hello Aliza,can you explain more about this vulnerability strenght concept?I can´t catch it yet.
I have sun+saturn 3ºh+ic+mercuryR in cancer squared by Pluto..i need to dig in deeply to understand and make it usefull(virgo moon)
thank you
Hi Paula. I’ll blog about it again if I get inspired! Will ponder and see if I have more to say.