On my “Letter to Readers” post, a loyal reader suggested I write about my Saturn transit since I’m in the middle of one and having trouble writing! So thank you for the suggestion. I appreciate it. I appreciate the other folks who chimed in too.
The thing is… I want to write something hopeful and helpful and I’m just… not… feeling it. It’s an odd feeling knowing that people are waiting. Okay. Wrong word. Not waiting. But they will read what I write once it shows up in their email. Or however they find me.
And it hasn’t just been lack of time and energy. I’ve started a few posts and… they would just fall-off, fall out of my brain. Even the ones I did post have felt “half” to me. I want to keep this an astrology blog but I swear if I gave myself permission to write about food and lo-carb diets and eating disorders… I’d probably get myself writing again. Maybe I should because it’s really on my mind. Hmmm…
And maybe this reflects Moon and Mars in Cancer square Saturn as well. Emotional about eating. Feeling oppressed by food. VERY Mars in Cancer square Saturn. And it’s not that I feel oppressed by food… it’s that I wish I didn’t have to eat. But I get hungry. My blood sugar drops too.
Ever since I went lo-carb, I lost pleasure in food. Now, I don’t think this is a bad thing, especially for my chart, which has Mars in Cancer square Jupiter. I prefer food to be fuel, to be neutral, rather than a secret passion or pleasure because for my genetics and frame and health… it just leads to overweight and high blood pressure and diabetes (which so many in my family had). And that hot hot food pleasure, for me, would lead to one thing: eating too much which led to stomach problems which led to more problems (IBS for instance).
So having a more balanced relationship with food is good. And yet. And yet at the bottom of it all is a kind of resentment at needing to care for the body. Why can’t it run on air? Why this constant upkeep? It’s like the house getting dirty. All of this is so Virgo. So Virgo Moon and Pluto. The body, the house, the process, the routine. I am a Cancer Sun so of course my Moon is undergoing a Saturn transit as well, even indirectly.
I am just rolling these thoughts around in my head. Nothing conclusive. Not even pondering my natal this morning but I am sure that writing, for me, is my food. How it soothes, how it comforts, how I Must Not Stop Writing, or trying to write, no matter the transit or the mood. I write my way out of transits and moods, even if they return once I’m done.
So, loyal readers, I don’t sit down with a coffee and a donut and look at my chart. Usually it’s a piece of cheese and my chart 🙂 Not so bad, eh?
But let’s see… before I end this post… searching the brain… for something… hopeful… helpful… if you have a wonky relationship with food or a fabulous relationship with food… or just like to talk about food… or not… tell me in the comments and maybe you’ll inspire my next post… and we’ll go a little deeper next time.
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