You know what they say — you know what they say about this time of year – that the veil becomes thin – that the veil is lifted – between this world and the next. The October Full Moon is the Moon of the Dead, the Ancestor Moon. The raven is her bird. Have a feast for your dead. Gussy up your altar.
Gosh I remember… it’s a bad memory. I think it was close to Halloween time in a recent year and I had created this huge… this huge altar for my ancestors (something I rarely do – ancestor work is not a big part of my practice) and my housemate at the time put it down, put *ME* down in essence. I didn’t question myself. What was said was cruel. I had spent all morning creating this beautiful thing. I burst into tears and stayed that way, bereft. Of course I was told that it was just a joke and wasn’t really insulting at all. How could I have taken it that way?
Thus I look forward to this year – a reclamation. THIS is truly my New Year.
I think I felt it the other day, felt my magick come back, my craft come back. My desire for this come back. An old friend. The late summer (September) had been challenging. You eat, you sleep, you work. You don’t even pray. You don’t light your candles. Survival = the minimum of the minimum of the minimum. But then the wheel turns. I’m certain of it now. It took October to bring it.
And then the mediumship, something I’ve started doing in my readings “by accident” — it just kind of happens sometimes and reading a little about Samhain and celebrating it and realizing that I am hungry, literally hungry to visit a cemetery, not to visit anyone in particular, either of my parents (their old bodies in Florida) but just to — it’s hard to explain but it’s the SAME feeling I get when I do mediumship in a reading. Idon’t have the words. It’s a feeling. It makes my heart feel good and full. No pain in it. No breaks. Good and full. Hello. Hello in there. Hello. How I loved that cemetery in Iowa City where the Black Angel stood. I used to feel weird about all this. I don’t anymore. Jupiter through my 12th made it even more okay.
If this holiday resonates for you, you can create your own rituals. You can discover ideas on-line or in books. Research. I think it’s going to get ever more delicious of course once we hit Scorpio Season (everyone knows I love Scorpio, my mother’s sign).
Magic(k) for me will always be more feeling and intention and visualization than the things, the tools, but tools and things are good too – especially for this time of year – the colors and smells of fall. But more important is how it feels – calm, peace. I think I’ve crossed over. I don’t mean THAT crossed over. But I’ve crossed over or through a threshold of fear which gripped me since late August (or throughout the entire Uranus Pluto square). Phase One is done. I’m happy to report (and I say it with a little anxiety) but phase one is done.
Blessed October to you xx