Easter, Resurrection, Pluto, and You, Back From The Dead 13


"pluto transit to the 8th  house"

I spent my 30s searching for the perfect therapist and as I type these words I realize that “perfection” wasn’t the point. Damn Good would have been good enough. I may even have had more therapists than boyfriends during those years.

There was K. (to name one) who kept talking about how smart I was (and sure, like anyone, I’m smart at some things and really dumb at others). She didn’t seem to understand that smart and functional could be worlds apart.

And then there was R. He never said anything interesting. I would wait for insight. It was painful.

Listen, switching therapists is not uncommon for those with chronic whatever. We keep trying to find something, someone, that can really help. It’s like the trail and error process of medication. Who can get inside us, hear us, listen, and cough up some practical and inspirational guidance. Maybe Jesus. Maybe no one.

And they say that what sometimes happens is that we leave a therapist when the going gets tough. Kind of like what happens in relationships, ya know? Too close, too intimate, time to go! “You have touched my junk. No one is allowed to touch my junk. My junk cannot bear the light of day. Please close your eyes and leave. Thanks.”

And therapy doesn’t need to be a process without dignity but some of that feels built in. You’re a “patient” or a “client” — someone in need of help and oh yes they make sure we know that seeking help is the big strong grown up thing to do and then they proceed to strangle us with myopic mediocre lack of insight.

I kept giving R. more chances to be deep. It didn’t happen.

***

A Tarot Reader once told me that I needed to figure out a lot of my stuff on my own, not through therapy. And then the other day was reading an Astrology book that said that where Pluto is in our natal chart (my 1st House meaning ME) is where we must face things alone. And yet Astrology did help me, tremendously, Astrology, Tarot, Readers, Readings, my spiritual process, friends…

***

After my mother died, in my  mid-20s I had an awesome therapist who I’ll never forget. Even though she couldn’t keep me from quitting jobs or drowning in whatever deep end I was trying to swim in, she got me teaching despite my unbearable stage fright. She was that good.

And then when I could no longer teach due to depression or anxiety and I can’t even remember the chain of events, I slowly let it fall apart. Did I even tell her? I don’t remember.

She had that famous Anais Nin quote that everyone quotes all the time hanging up in her office.

She was so… present.

***

And when I see someone having a long transit to their 8th House, the first thing I think of is therapy of some kind. That it’s time for that kind of exposure. That it’s worth it to find a good person.

Think of it as preventing crisis. That if you root around in your basement and discover a problem with the foundation, a crack that needs repair to keep the elements out… you’re one step ahead. Maybe. And even if bad shit happens, as it sometimes does, you’ll have a support person already there.

8th House transits are green lights but the direction isn’t so much full speed ahead as go underground and dig. And don’t forget your lantern and your snacks and your teddy bear and a sweater. It can get chilly in the Underworld.

***

I am not a Christian and I don’t know all that much about the deeper meanings of Easter but I do know that Resurrection is possible even while you are alive. That you can spend years dead and buried and then a hand, your hand, reaches up, out of the ground.

Do you have an Easter story?

xo

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About aliza

Hello my name is Aliza and I help people. I'm a Tarot Reader and Astrologer, Teacher & Writer. Cancer Sun, Mercury, and Mars. Virgo Moon Pluto Hekate conjunction in the 1st House. If you aren't sure what all that means, I'll be happy to explain it to you! Or maybe you'd rather hear about your own chart :) I blog and do readings for a living. Poet and playwright, Iowa MFA, I got obsessed with astrology in my late 30s and the rest is history. For the moment.


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13 thoughts on “Easter, Resurrection, Pluto, and You, Back From The Dead

  • T.S. Christian (@parisianfeline)

    Natally, I don’t have anything in the 8th house, which sometimes makes me sad because it seems like such a great house! Right now I’ve Jupiter transitting my 8th house, and I don’t know how long jupiter transits last, but I’ve been feeling the need to go to therapy for various reasons.

    And it makes me think of what you wrote about Pluto – wherever it is in the chart we have to deal with alone. My Pluto rests in my 2nd house, the house of finances but self-esteem And I suppose it’s something I must deal with alone because I’ve never met anyone who was able to help me with my self-esteem problems. And I’m of the general mindset that no one can.

    Sadly, I have no Easter story – but perhaps one day I will! :]

  • Bella

    I’m glad you brought up the topic of Easter and resurrection. I have had that “ah ha!” moment today after talking with my mother about my feelings of betrayal and pain with past relationship(s) with an ex and friends as of late. After this “slap in the face” talk with my mother who finally opened my eyes to my ways in self-pity, my continuous feelings of anger, deceit and loss I then wrote in my journal….but this time only positive things – and not about those not-so-good feelings I was talking about with her.

    I mentioned Easter and although I am not religious nor do I remember the entire reason behind Easter and it’s purpose – I wrote about my own resurrection in myself. My strengths, my own forgiveness (to myself and to others), my rebirth in a way. My new beginnings. No doubt the past 6 months – even past year have been trying and have felt like I have been fighting an uphill battle for happiness and love and success. I have finally come to a fork in the road, my new path. And I have decided not to continue down this path of self destruction, despair and loneliness any longer. I feel quit relieved, reborn and feel a sense of growth within my self.

    I am still anxiously awaiting a time ( next semester) when I have more financial means to have a reading by you and possibly some lessons in reading my own chart….I continue to read yours daily and try and learn the aspects of my planets and signs – but feel I need more hands on or at least more personal guidance in this area…but until then I completely feel this energy in resurrection, be it the planets, the day, my sign or my ability to finally let go of the old and continue into the new.

    Thank you for this post…..it has cemented these feelings completely. WIshing you well and a wonderful Easter Sunday (what ever that may mean to you on this day). :)

  • Alex

    What you say about Pluto’s presence signalling where we’re alone in life makes a lot of sense. I’ve always felt like I was fundamentally on my own in life, but never more-so than recently. For the first time, though, it’s comfortable. It doesn’t make me happy- whatever that would mean to me, at this point in my life- but I no longer feel desperate to have someone, anyone in my life. This is probably stuff being cleared up by my Saturn return, as Saturn moves into Scorpio.
    Jupiter is conjunct my natal Chiron in my eighth house, where it opposes my Jupiter in Scorpio. For a while, I’ve felt like I were in the Underworld. It’s not a scary place, though. It’s dark and cool, and no one bothers me. It’s everything above ground that’s scary.

  • somanyjens

    This is kinda what I mean when I say that I feel Pluto all over my chart externally. Since I was very young, I’ve been involved in Pluto themed “upheavals”. My dad left, my mom left, changed schools a lot, ran away, stopped going to school, lived in a group home, I was a nanny for some incredibly wealthy people, went back to school; always moving & changing just about everything. It’s a lot to process & I’ve struggled with anxiety & depression too. I feel like I’ve been a dozen different people. At least. ;) It’s cliched but I can’t say all of that didn’t make me a better, stronger person than I could’ve been otherwise. Happier than I could’ve been otherwise.

  • suzieguillette

    Aliza, this is one of my all-time favorite posts of yours. I could totally relate to the “going it alone” theme. I have Pluto in the 4th, which may account for why I’ve come to the place of realizing that talk therapy is not for me (at least not anymore)–meaning that when it comes to my foundations, I need to go it alone. I say this as someone who has been turned off by (but still in) therapy on and off since the age of 12. My brother’s therapist, who I was forced to visit occasionally, used to call our house to speak with my parents. If I answered, he’d ask how I was. When I’d say, “Pretty good,” he’d reply, “Pretty good as opposed to??” As you can imagine, I was not a fan…

    Anyway, what I love the most about this post, aside from the gems, is your writerly voice. It’s so satisfying to read something and feel/know that I am in good hands. Thank you.

    • alizamoonpluto Post author

      Awwww thank you Suzie :) Ya know, I was one of those people that my mom would say “maybe need therapy her whole life” — and she didn’t mean this in a bad way, but that I needed counseling, guidance to help my intense emotions. I was in my early 20s at the time… So I know about the lifelong therapy thing but ya know…. other stuff/strength/inner guidance kicks in when it starts being more occasional versus weekly or daily lol

      Anyway, thank you xoxo hugs xoxo

  • Rafael VR

    Hey! im your fan!

    So, my sister has Pluto in Libra in the first house oposing her Sun in the 7th. She used to be very alone in her 20′s and now Uranus in Aries is conjuction her Sun, she has that quick silver light around her that you could notice from eons away, her life has completed changed, she got divorced last year living behing a 7 years rela., and got married another, got into the gym and now she wants to be a bodybuilder, her body looks like now a totally new person, I would never imagine that shy and closed girl could someday shine silver like she is today, is difficult to dig her thoughts and her emotions, she is not a like free-talker of emotions, that makes me think of that… secret the body holds and it reflected trough it without you even knowing about it, her body now… ohgosh i could never ever tell the way she is today, saturn is just leaving its saturn return, and she is happy than ever. Pluto in the first makes a person leave the world behind after the simbolical ressuraction that happens once the hand is reaches terra firme.
    She has never felt depression though… or at least i think that! Even when Saturn is tight conjunction her Pluto, I think she used to always be hard on herself.
    And the most important thing… not everybody is going to get along well with their therapists… Astrologer Donna Cunningan says that each person deserves a therapist, as it is very common in the new york culture, but the therapist must be very well indicated and according to your ‘moon’s’ need… since you are there dealing with your emotions. Supposed you have Moon in Virgo but is a Cancer that misses the mother, you would be better get along well with a female, which you would project on her some qualities your mother had and the parts that you miss, but the therapist should also be very careful and detailed oriented in order to cooperate with your ‘needs’ in therapy. I am not therapist, but astrologers could suggests people that are much more their ‘faces’ before handeling them with a professional.

    Love your blog!
    Rafael VR

  • lilliput

    Hi Aliza

    I like that thing you said about Pluto – needing to work it through on your own. I have pluto in the 7th and that’s the house of relationships so its kind of hard to work it out on your own – not to say that therapy works either – I’ve been at it for 6 years and I’m stlil single……